Retaining evidence of ANYTHING you’ve ever said or done is foolish if not actionable, particularly if you’ve said and done the type of things I’ve said and done. But I am human, after all, and have a unique soft spot for the many many many acrobatic moments I’ve shared with willing ladies over the years. So how best to cherish these memories?

Most suggest a tawdry list or tally – hardly the proper forum for exalting the unique feminine beauties who, at some point in the past, so graciously let you nail them. That’s why I suggest today’s nostalgic gentlemen create and maintain a well-crafted scrapbook. Here’s how to do it.

NOTE: Fight the urge to turn your scrapbook into a coffee table book. Lack of secrecy can and will lead to disastrous consequences, including, but not limited to, the destruction of your treasured scrapbook.




Something tasteful that captures the true essence of the woman. You’ll want to experiment to find your own style, but I’ve found the combination of zoom lens and cleavage to be the most classically rewarding.


For instance, did you conjugate in a hotel? Well that room key doesn’t just unlock a room, it unlocks the memory of getting laid in that room.


Preferably, the background color of each page should reflect some aspect of your quarry. Was she Goth? Make it black. Was she a bride? Make it white. Was she a nun? How about a mixture of black and white.


Here’s where I really like to get creative. On page 83 of my own scrapbook, I detail a roll in the hay with a strapping young milkmaid. We quite literally rolled in hay. Hence, I constructed a border out of strands of hay I later found attached to my underpants.


A picture is worth a thousand words, but sometimes those thousand words leave you little to no idea just who the girl was, or more importantly, just who you were. More information is always helpful. Here’s a sample journal from one of my scrapbook pages:

Alias: Elsworth Di Bona

Angle: Prince of Norway – I was to set sail to reclaim my rightful Norwegian throne stolen from me by the evil Dr. Reifenstandt. It was a dangerous, and most likely, deadly mission but such was the risk necessary to ensure my family crest be restored to its rightful, noble grandeur. My enemies could have been lurking anywhere, so it was imperative I secure safe lodging for the night.

Girl: Jenni Hendriks

Measurements: 36-24-35

Special notes: Great backrubs. Unfortunately, roommate raised by elderly Norwegian aunt.

If seen again: Pretend you have twin brother; amnesia; or you’re undercover and can’t talk now.


Not only have you commemorated your conquests in a classier way than the traditional notch on the bedpost, but you’ve also embarked on a lifelong hobby that will bestow great personal joy for years to come. Which brings us to the final and most important step of scrapbooking…


– Taken from Barneys Blog

Stuipid freight trains and my late relief, is what i get caught in, all the time…

Faulty coal train causes line chaos

17/05/2008 4:00:00 AM
The breakdown of a Pacific National coal train on one of two commuter lines linking Illawarra and Sydney has again highlighted the problem of routes shared by freight and people movers.

Hundreds of commuters were late for work yesterday after southbound coal train NW38 suffered a mechanical failure about 6am between Engadine and Loftus.

The train was travelling from the northern coal fields to Port Kembla.

Pacific National last night confirmed there had been a problem with a coupling linking the fully loaded wagons.

The back wagons were pulled into a siding to allow workmen to replace the coupling.

The engine was able to continue along the line.

Southbound commuter trains were suspended until about 8.15am but the breakdown had a knock-on effect for commuters travelling in both directions, causing major delays.

The delays came on the same day comments from transport expert Philip Laird, from the University of Wollongong, were published in the Mercury.

The line was “coming under increasing pressure with freight and passengers” he said, indicating the problem would become worse with duplication of the Sutherland-Cronulla line over the next two years.

The impact and financial cost to commuters of sharing the line with freight trains is sure to be considered as part of the $300,000 pre-feasibility study of the mothballed Maldon-to-Dombarton rail link, formalised in the budget this week.

The drama meant buses had to replace trains in both directions, from Sutherland to Waterfall and Wollongong to Thirroul.

However, passengers such as Pierre Thibaudeau were further delayed because of confusion over which bus to take, with all-stop and direct services available.

The Wollongong TAFE teacher, who travels from Kings Cross each morning, had boarded a bus at Sutherland only to be told that a train would soon arrive.

Eventually, he changed to another bus.

He missed his early classes due to the delay.

“What I’m really angry about is not the delay, but the insanity of a system that has freight and passenger trains sharing the same track,” Mr Thibaudeau said.